Friday, May 10, 2013

the Stupid Art


The effeminate father of liberalism, John Stuart Mill divided the world of convictions into two groups: one of the adherents to his imaginary descriptions of the ways in which human interactions should be and the other group consistent of people who disagree with him. He called them the Stupid Party.
Insolent it was and very quickly became the peremptory tone of all liberal pronouncements. Now, I think it is right to take example from their catastrophic success and call modern art – Stupid Art. The art we call “modern” has not been modern for a  hundred years ! No longer “modern”, ambulating about with aid of a walker and shakily waiving its colostomy bag. What is “modern” about it ?
There is nothing by which one can tell that a piece of art in front of the viewer is truly “modern” , except for one instantaneous recognition, unifying all of “modern art” – it is strikingly stupid. What is presented to view is purposefully made in some hinterland of retardation and now is coyly asking for our kindness we give to retards.
What follows here is a brief checklist for recognition of Stupid Art addressed to visitors of art museums and galleries,art centers ,open studios and even public art. With the Stupid Art Checklist anyone will be able to identify it with 100 % accuracy, which surely is something vanishingly rare in times where “all is relative” and “it is just your opinion”.

First on the List should be immediate realization that the hasty author of the art-piece did not feel that learning how to draw from observation of reality could be  at all necessary first step in the direction of visual art. One that guarantee nothing, or nothing more than knowledge of grammar would guarantee to the poet. 




 This is a painting by the great American artist Milton Avery,who made his absolute inability to draw into a hallmark of his maniere.

Whether it was “haste” or rather general assumption that all you need is to pick up a crayon or a paintbrush and start smearing something across. The pleasurable effect is exactly like the half-forgotten delight of making blobs of gerber-food around the dining table. Plop here and plop over there! What innocent fun! Everything we do is so severely judged and here, in a small but perfect Romper-Room of Art anything is “wonderful”.
From such broadest approval of any outcome as “wonderful” comes the ugly, the misshapen, the primitive form signaling its belonging to the Stupid Art.

Another artistic triumph by Milton Avery-what could anyone want to add? It's simply perfect.


Second on the List of recognizing artwork as Stupid Art is eye-opening mind-exploding  radical absence of any content that could be traced to human mental activity.It is not easy  for a normal person to find enough blankness, simpering simulation of cretinism to be successful at it but some have shown laudable aptitude. 

Don't avert your eyes,look at it. The dish-water background cleverly contrasts with rectangles of primary paints. IKEA meets swill-water,you may think-but that is not what the artist ,Hans Hofmann intended.The title is "Memoria in Eterna",no less!


In my own 55 years of contacts with Stupid Art no one has created anything as idiotic as Hans Hofmann.
Remember-if the art-piece you are regarding is making you exclaim “What in tarnation is this????”than  you  are seeing something from the vast collection of Stupid Art.